Becoming a Better Role Model by Working Less
Disclaimer: the opinions expressed by the author of this article don’t necessarily represent the opinions of NAWA as an organization.
I started my actuarial career after graduating from the University of Wisconsin in 2016 full of excitement and energy about my new job. Having previously interned with this company, I knew that I loved the work, the culture, and the coworkers. However, I also entered the job market with a deep sense of insecurity and a strong need to “prove myself.” I felt this, in part, because I was a woman entering a male-dominated STEM field. I fought this imposter syndrome by working extremely hard: I billed a lot of hours, studied as much as possible, frequently worked late at night and weekends, and generally put everything outside of my career – hobbies, friends, family, and health – off to the side.
It's important that I clarify this was entirely self-imposed; my family, friends, mentors, and colleagues all encouraged me to find a better balance and work less. However, I was driven by a strong desire and need to achieve what I now consider to be superficial measures of success.
I have been extremely fortunate to have great mentors and role models throughout the last seven years, and over time I recognized three very important things:
Sacrificing work / life balance and working long hours generally does not lead to higher performance (and in many cases actually deteriorates performance).
Prioritizing short-term and superficial measures of success (such as promotions, raises, and billable hours targets) over personal interests and goals would likely lead to lower performance over the long-term.
The people who I respect and identify as role models do not sacrifice everything for their career; rather, they have the confidence to identify their own goals and priorities and set boundaries with work and with colleagues.
NAWA’s mission is to “connect and empower women of all backgrounds, races, ethnicities, and life circumstances to be successful in the actuarial profession.” As we continue to work towards this mission, it is important that we all – at every level of the organization or exam process – consider how we can empower women by serving as mentors and role models.
In my opinion, one of the best ways we can act as role models is to establish a healthy work / life balance while also working hard and maintaining strong performance throughout our career. We’ve all heard the debate on whether women can “have it all,” and people continue to argue that it’s not possible. As a result, many women in the workforce may look to others (particularly in leadership and mentorship positions) to provide an answer on whether it is possible. A lack of role models with success and work / life balance may deter women from wanting to pursue more from their career. However, as many of us know, it is possible to do both, and we can serve as examples for both our peers and the next generation.
I have plenty to learn on this topic, and I’m confident I’ll never fully perfect this at any point in my career. However, here are a few pieces of advice based on my experiences and mentorships so far.
Work / life balance is unique. The optimal boundaries and work / life balance vary between individuals and over time. No two people are the same, and every person encounters different challenges. Additionally, circumstances change from year to year and even month to month. I found significant improvement in my performance and attitude toward work when I started defining and tracking my own goals and metrics, rather than relying on others to define them for me.
Health and relationships are crucial. One of the hardest aspects of work / life balance for me has been maintaining healthy habits and relationships consistently. It is too easy to skip a workout, order food delivery, or call my mom tomorrow when an urgent client email comes in at 5:00 PM. I now realize there’s not really a point to a successful career if I don’t have my health or any relationships. Additionally, better health and relationships actually improve my performance as I have more energy and I am more confident at my job.
Short-term and long-term success does not always correlate. I recently received great advice from a mentor pointing out that short-term achievements do not always lead to long-term success. In many cases, the steps we take to maximize short-term success can actually be detrimental to our long-term goals. This mentor encouraged me to identify my long-term priorities and focus on the actions I need to achieve those goals. For example, I now spend more of my time on team and staff development and less time maximizing my billable hours. In some cases, short-term outcomes may be less than optimal, but over time we will achieve more for both ourselves and our organizations.
Values can reduce the never-ending to-do list: One way I’ve cut back on my workload is by first identifying my own values and interests and then saying no to any request that doesn’t fit. A mentor once told me “Everything should be a hell yes or a no.” Every person in a corporate environment will always have some uninteresting but unavoidable tasks, but I suspect that many, if not all, of us could reduce our commitment to these types of tasks by saying no more frequently. After adopting this approach in both my work and my personal life, I’ve been much happier and more excited about my schedule.
It is possible to establish boundaries and still succeed. I expected my work performance to suffer after I started setting boundaries and pursuing activities and hobbies outside of work. However, this never happened. As my billable hours decreased, other areas of my performance improved. Making time for rest, hobbies, and healthy habits allowed me to have better creativity, problem-solving, stress management, and leadership skills.
Most emails aren’t as important as everyone thinks. I’ve occasionally been subject to clients and bosses expressing dissatisfaction because I didn’t respond to an email fast enough. However, looking back on those events a year or so later, they really didn’t matter. Those clients still hire me, and my bosses recognize that the long-term goals drive more value. I encourage everyone to be more comfortable with letting a few things slip in the short-term in the interest of prioritizing the most essential projects and better work / life balance. Ultimately, I think you will find that it’s beneficial for all involved if you make space for meaningful activities at the expense of the noise and “urgent” emails that we all encounter every day.
For anyone interested in exploring this topic further, I’ve found the following books to be extremely helpful and insightful:
Bio: Jessi Kildow is a senior actuarial manager with Milliman in Milwaukee, Wisconsin. She graduated from the University of Wisconsin – Madison and obtained her Fellowship with the Society of Actuaries in 2020. She works in a non-traditional actuarial role and is passionate about improving the cost and quality of healthcare in the United States through alternative payment models. Jessi supports the Network of Actuarial Women and Allies (NAWA) through her role on NAWA’s Leadership Council, and volunteers each week with Braven, an organization with a mission to empower promising, underrepresented young people. Outside of her career and volunteer commitments, Jessi enjoys running and hiking with her dog Moose.
The Virtual Revolution: NAWA Book Club
Disclaimer: the opinions expressed by the author of this article don't necessarily represent the opinions of NAWA as an organization.
As COVID-19 endured, we, as humans, found new ways to connect. Left to the confines of our respective countries….
cities….
homes….
families….
We peered outside the hustle and bustle of daily life when we paused in March of 2020. We reevaluated the resources we did have, namely, the internet. In my opinion, I don’t think any other century before us could have pulled off quarantine quite like we did. With online grocery and cuisine delivery, we stayed safe, and fed, in style. We checked in with our loved ones in real time – being able to hear their voices and see their faces. FaceTime. Anytime. What a comfort. As time went on, we started to look outside our neighborhoods, social groups and offices. To come to realize: if we are connecting virtually, then we can connect literally to ANYONE in this big world via Wi-Fi connection.
My daughter took writing classes tailored specifically to her in-depth interest in Herpetology via OutSchool (1). My beloved Mother’s group went virtual and attracted new moms from all around the world in need of love and support. I attended more actuarial seminars and conferences virtually than I possibly could have in person. I made connections with other actuaries, not because we shared an elevator, but because we shared a goal, a passion, an interest.
NAWA (Network of Actuarial Women and Allies) is connected in a similar fashion. Scouring the country for humans out there that share a common goal, passion or interest. This one goal/passion/interest unites us, but it’s our differences that bring value. The advice of a more senior actuary, or the male perspective, or a fresh view point from a recent college grad all add value to what NAWA is.
The NAWA book club is the brain child of this. NAWA members in all different time zones and actuarial backgrounds reading the same book at the same time and meeting together virtually to discuss key topics, share their thoughts and experiences.
In March and April 2023, we read “The Myth of the Nice Girl: Achieving a Career you Love Without Becoming a Person you Hate” by Fran Hauser (2). Fran showed us how to take our natural instincts to be caring and watch out for each other and turn it into a super power at work. She redefined Nice.
Nice can be a team player.
Nice can be collaborative.
Nice can be a mentor.
Nice can be respectful and professional while still being able to negotiate, make decisions, speak up, show ambition and close the deal. By investing in yourself and setting boundaries, you, yes, you, the “too nice” person in the office, or the quiet introvert, or even the hard-working, talented person who has been burned in the past – you, too, can harness the super power of niceness.
This hit home for me. As an introvert that gets excited about spreadsheets and book clubs, I have always valued having someone in my corner to encourage me to share my thoughts, negotiate for what I deserve and give feedback.
To be frank, I wish I could have read this book in my 20’s. Many points Fran made I could resonate with as lessons I learned the hard way early on in my career. The way she gave examples and strategies to try really felt like a caring mentor rooting for me. Through books like this, the NAWA Book Club, and the NAWA Mentorship Program, actuaries and allies are able to make this world a better place.
Meet Tamara
Tamara Wilt, ASA, MAAA is a Life and Health Consulting Actuary in Tampa Bay, FL. She graduated from the University of Nebraska – Lincoln with a bachelors degree in Actuarial Science in 2007 and obtained her Associateship with the Society of Actuaries in 2011. She started Actuarial Guidepoint, LLC in 2012. She is passionate about her work, providing accurate and timely actuarial work while providing a high level of detail and thinking outside the box when it comes to creating solutions. Stepping in and filling a need for companies in transition, short term projects, or in need of specialized expertise.
End Notes
2 Hauser, Fran, 2018, “The Myth of the Nice Girl: Achieving a Career you Love Without Becoming a Person you Hate”
https://www.amazon.com/Myth-Nice-Girl-Achieving-Becoming/dp/1328832953
https://www.franhauser.com/nice-girl
3 If you are interested in joining the NAWA book club, contact Kim Guerriero at Kim.Guerriero@milliman.com
The Intersection: How Actuaries Can and Should be Empowered to Move the Needle on Equity
Disclaimer: the opinions expressed by the author of this article don't necessarily represent the opinions of NAWA as an organization.
Does anyone else feel like 2020 was a whole #mood that changed the entire trajectory of their life? If I rewind to where I was sitting exactly three years ago, it’s hard to even recognize the person that I was, sitting at my makeshift home desk that was supposed to only need to suffice for a two week stay-at-home order, in a different city, working at a different company, even with a different marital status. What has transpired since then is nothing short of a complete transformation, from the person who I was, obsessively focused on my next professional goal or personal milestone, to the 2023 version of myself who is my own boss, surrounded by love and support, obsessively focused on harnessing the superpowers that make me who I am today, and using them for good. Something had to come of the swirl of grief of the loss that we as a society have experienced, gratitude for my own health, and reflection on the life that I had vs. the life that I wanted.
Here we are three years later, three years which included a move to Minnesota, a wedding, adding a second dog to our family, and flipping my career upside-down. Late 2020, I decided to pour my life savings, all the social capital and goodwill I had built up, and every waking hour over the subsequent two years to build a company that consistently asks “why not?”. I was determined to build a place that bets our money on our people, pouring our resources into making them feel valued and supported, while doing work that was both engaging and mission-driven.
Athena Actuarial Consulting is a woman-owned consulting firm focused on mitigating risk and identifying opportunity in the way that humans are cared for, compensated, benefitted, and incentivized through actuarial services, data analytics and people-centered strategies. Our mission-driven approach to empowering our employees to bring their best, whole self to each project translates to innovative and holistic solutions for our clients and their covered populations. Whether it's a fellow consulting firm, a community-based healthcare program or an employer-sponsored fund, we approach each ask from our clients with the true client in mind - the ultimate beneficiaries of the program we're supporting and their families. Our clients rely on our sensitivity to their needs, team-player mentality, and "tell it like it is" attitude to have the data and the confidence to enact change within their own organizations; we are proud to support them as a collaborative, empathetic, and focused extension of their team every day.
Every night as I wrap up work, which is earlier and earlier these days as work-life balance is beginning to feel within reach, I reflect on how my current role as CEO of Athena is a position which I feel uniquely qualified to fulfill. Each day is a rollercoaster of challenges, both personally and professionally, and I have never felt that my heart, my head and my gut were more aligned. Better yet, concurrent with the exponential growth that we experienced in 2022, growing from 1.5 employees to 24, I have been connected with the most amazing, like-minded women who have embarked on a similar path, including the fellow Co-Founders of NAWA. It seems that something was sparked during those lonely days in quarantine, and we all believed that there just had to be something different…something better…out there for ourselves and our families.
Each March, we celebrate Women’s History Month. This month is a great time to reflect on how far we’ve come, to celebrate successful women breaking barriers and glass ceilings. It’s also a time to examine how far we still have to go until we reach parity. Sitting here in 2023, women are still earning just 82 cents for every dollar that a man earns, dropped from 83 cents for every dollar in 2022 (Gender Pay Gap Statistics in 2023, Forbes). That figure drops to 58 cents for every dollar when comparing women of color to non-Hispanic white men. Beyond compensation, more and more research has been pushed out around health equity and wealth equity – revealing that this gap expands beyond base salary, it extends into the education, utilization and maximization of employer-sponsored benefits. As a health or pension actuary, never before has it been easier to tie your purpose to your professional experience. As experts in these employer-sponsored benefits, we are already in the rooms where these conversations around equity should be happening. If they aren’t top of mind for you or your employer, whether you’re on the insurance side, the consulting side, or in industry, I would seriously question that organization’s on-paper commitment to diversity, equity and inclusion. We have the ability to infuse purpose into the work we’re doing every day by stepping back, looking at the big picture, and viewing our work through this lens of identifying areas where privilege and access to opportunity may be driving inequity.
My question for you, is what are you going to do about it? Are you overwhelmed, or even paralyzed when considering how we can disrupt systems that have been in place for decades, or even centuries? Here are my recommendations:
Start small, read up on the way in which equity intersects with the work that you’re doing and what you can be doing to encourage decision-makers to infuse this into the conversation.
·Educate yourself on how to get comfortable having the difficult conversations, because I can promise that anything that moves the needle is going to come with resistance.
Surround yourself with people who will pick you up when faced with adversity. People in powerful positions have a decision to make when they arrive there – make the path more accessible for people who look different from them, or, do nothing and allow the inequities of the system to continue to be affirmed and re-affirmed. My wish for you is that you will cross paths more frequently with the latter than the former, but prepare yourself for both scenarios by having your core group of “trouble-makers” to remind you why you’re sticking your neck out.
Here at Athena, equity is embedded in all elements of our internal operations and how we approach our client engagements. We are working hard to both support employers working to make equity a priority through our pay equity work, in additional to developing assets that can be provided to the general public to arm them with the knowledge they need to advocate for themselves and others. The public report we are most proud of is Athena’s Pay Equity Report, which is available on our website here. Even though it was published in 2022, the key takeaways remain valuable. As a special benefit to NAWA members, and for reading this far into this article, I’d love to personally extend the offer to make this report available for free.
Interested in seeing some of the work that we’re doing at Athena to start these conversations around compensation, healthcare, and retirement? Check out some of our related work.
Equity in the Workplace , by Lauren Holec
Perks of a Pay Equity Assessment, by Lauren Holec
Humanizing Healthcare: Is the System Making Strides, by Patsy Freeland and Paula Villafane
Humanizing Healthcare: Mental Health Parity for Non-Healthcare Professionals, by Veronica Fontama
Humanizing Healthcare: Benefit Equity Audits, by Paula Villafane
Equity & Total Rewards, a panel with Adrienne (Ostroff) Lieberthal, Lauren Holec and Paula Villafane, recording will be made available afterwards
About Adrienne
Adrienne founded ATHENA in 2020 after a decade of experience consulting large pension and benefit programs across sectors, industries and geographies at two large consulting firms. She is passionate about creating an authentic and inclusive environment for her team to bring their full self to work, each and every day. In addition to her “day job” as CEO and Founder of ATHENA, Adrienne is a frequent Board member and volunteer across the actuarial profession, with a mix of technical roles specializing in the future outlook of U.S. mortality and leadership roles in organizations dedicated to empowering women in the actuarial profession. She is one of the Co-Founders of the Network of Actuarial Women and Allies (NAWA), which brings together her passions and expertise to build programs that attract, develop and aspire women who work as actuaries across insurance and consulting.
Outside of starting her own business, Adrienne enjoys doing anything outside – hiking, skiing, kayaking – especially where she is alongside her two dogs, Rocky and Shelby, and her partner, Josh.
The Small Business Maternity Plan
Disclaimer: the opinions expressed by the author of this article don't necessarily represent the opinions of NAWA as an organization.
On March 12, 2020, when no one was invited back to work or school for quite some time, the game changed. The flow throughout the day of work and school was suddenly condensed to less than 2,300 (1) square feet on average. The needs of families and working professionals changed. What is it that women in the workplace need?
When I think of this I pause. So much attention has been given to the gender-pay gap (it’s real), diversity in leadership (yes, we are highly unrepresented). But, would a 17% (2) boost in my salary and/or a c-suite position really give me what I need to thrive, at work and at home? Would more money and more responsibility give me the work-life balance my sanity is begging for? As a number-crunching mama of three school-aged children, my heart says no, no it will not. Women in 2023 need the same thing women in 1823 and women in 1923 have needed, and that is SUPPORT. To be heard. To be included. To be connected to life-saving mentors and allies that can help them navigate the path of motherhood and life.
Larger companies are recognizing this. Through job security (such as FMLA), nursing support, paid maternity leave, short-term disability to support pregnancy complications, flexible schedules, temporary part-time hours, and let’s not forget paid paternity leave, now that is support!
But let’s talk small business. Small business does not have the regulations for these kinds of benefits, and for good reason: it would crush us!! As an entrepreneur, I have essentially created these benefits for myself along the way because they are completely necessary in order to come out breathing on the other side of creating a human being.
Job security – As actuaries, we know that if there is no guarantee, then there is risk exposure. Having an emergency savings account (reserve, if you will) large enough to cover this gap where you may be unemployed will take that fear out of the equation. Amy Schultz, Money Coach and Co-Founder of Bolder Money, recommends 3-6 months of expenses, in addition to extra amounts needed to continue your current standard of living. (3)
Time off – A new mother absolutely needs recovery time. For me, this meant relaxing my marketing efforts prior to the birth and hiring temporary help from other consultants to relieve me of those project responsibilities for the time being.
Flexible Schedule - A new baby’s day ebbs and flows through a 24-hour cycle, so unlike the 9-5 work day. A new mother may not be able to commit to eight day-time hours at a time, but she can still be relevant, efficient and prioritize the work that is essential for her company to thrive on the baby’s schedule.
Assistance – Paternity leave and extended paid maternity leave are amazing benefits to support families. Having in-the-room support of the father and an extra set of hands when baby comes home is a great step in helping families thrive. When this isn’t available, a new family still needs support. This could be found a grandparent or help outside the family.
This is where I want to expand. A working mother needs support. With only so many hours in a day, she needs to be able to prioritize what is important for her to participate in at work and at home and get assistance with the rest of it. Maybe this is a house cleaner, or a nanny (did you know there are night nannies?) I used College Nannies and Tutors. This is essentially an Uber for nannies. Picture this: a vibrant 20-year-old shows up at your house with a Venti Starbucks iced coffee in their hand ready to play, while you head back to the office for a glorious uninterrupted five-hour block of work. Nursing support? No need to pump. Everybody wins, even your child. Or, say your children go to school and you go to the office. The nanny shows up when school is out, full of energy, makes their snacks, does their homework with them, bathes them, and starts dinner. Voila, time to get off work.
Get help with the tasks that CAN be outsourced: car lines, lunch packing, chores, so you can be present for the things that matter: family meals, tucking them into bed, etc. At work, maybe there is an intern just waiting to get their hands on the monthly reports. Let them! When a family takes on something so huge as creating another life, space needs to be made. For me, the hardest thing besides BECOMING a parent was the continuous practice of letting go and asking for help. Now, I know this costs money, but we need to prioritize our sanity! Circling back to the gender wage gap, a 17% raise in income just might cover this.
The need for support has not changed, just the way we get it. To be heard, we must ask. To be included, we need to be able to show up: rested and supported.
Meet Tamara
Tamara Wilt, ASA, MAAA is a Life and Health Consulting Actuary in Tampa Bay, FL. She graduated from the University of Nebraska – Lincoln with a bachelors degree in Actuarial Science in 2007 and obtained her Associateship with the Society of Actuaries in 2011. She started Actuarial Guidepoint, LLC in 2012. She is passionate about her work, providing accurate and timely actuarial work while providing a high level of detail and thinking outside the box when it comes to creating solutions. Stepping in and filling a need for companies in transition, short term projects, or in need of specialized expertise.
End Notes
1 https://www.statista.com/statistics/456925/median-size-of-single-family-home-usa/
2 https://www.census.gov/library/stories/2022/03/what-is-the-gender-wage-gap-in-your-state.html
3 According to Amy Schultz, Money Coach, Co-Founder of Bolder Money, (and former Actuary!): small business owners need to think about emergency funds for themselves and for the business. On the personal side, it’s important for everyone to have an emergency fund of 3-6 months of earnings (ideally in a high yield savings account) in the case of job loss or being unable to work due to personal or health reasons. I prefer to use earnings instead of expenses as a guide so that your lifestyle and ability to invest don’t have to take a huge hit in the event of a loss of income. Likewise, small business owners should also have a business emergency fund of 3-6 months of all business and personal expenses plus standard of living, that can be used in the case of an unexpected downturn (like a pandemic).
Who… me? Confronting Imposter Syndrome
Disclaimer: the opinions expressed by the author of this article don't necessarily represent the opinions of NAWA as an organization.
The doubts come crowding in: How am I supposed to make that decision? Can I really figure this out? Who am I to lead the project? Your Imposter Syndrome is flaring up again and that’s okay. Let’s talk about this common phenomenon and what we can do about it.
What is Imposter Syndrome?
Imposter Syndrome is the belief that your accomplishments and position are a product of luck instead of skill and hard work. These thoughts can affect anyone, but women tend to experience these doubts more frequently and intensely than men. Women often attribute success to luck and effort instead of ability. Conversely, woman tend to site a lack of ability as the reason for failure. In comparison, men typically believe accomplishments are driven by their talent and failures are caused by luck or task difficulty. Continued accomplishment does not seem to diminish the feeling of imposter syndrome for high-achieving women. Self-doubt can cause stress and discomfort, but it doesn’t need to.
Tips and Tricks
What can you do to handle these feelings of uncertainty and apprehension? Here are some tips and tricks that have helped me. Hopefully one or more will resonate with you!
Use Reverse Empathy.
Put others in your shoes; Anyone would need to learn the nuances of the company, line of business, and job. Remember -- it’s not you, it’s the nature of doing something new and challenging. Recognizing that these feelings aren’t personal may help diminish their effect.
Notice it.
When do these feelings of imposter syndrome come up? Is it when you’re asked about a particular topic? The answer may clue you into an opportunity to strengthen your skillset or narrow in on a solution.
Be patient.
The best way to learn the job or task is to do the job or task. With anything, it takes time to adjust to new expectations and goals. Making a resolution to check back in with yourself in a month, quarter, or year to see how things are going and recognize how far you’ve come. Reflecting on steps that lead to improvement over time will build your confidence.
Accept it.
Know that imposter syndrome crops up sometimes. It’s alright. Take a few deep breaths or go for a short walk and then come back to the task. Disrupting the thought pattern with a conscious change of activity can clear and refocus your mind.
Appreciate it!
Imposter syndrome likely means you’re challenging yourself. You’re getting out of your comfort zone. This is a point of pride! Great job! Reframing the uncomfortable feelings as a positive sign diminishes their impact.
Following My Own Advice
I have to admit, I’m feeling imposter syndrome right now as I write this article. Who am I to give advice? Are my writing skills good enough to publish online? Do I want people to know that I experience imposter syndrome? So, here is how I’m applying my tips:
Accept it: I remind myself that doubts like this crop up from time to time. My stress diminishes when I acknowledge that this is typical for me and remind myself that these doubts will subside like other doubts have before.
Notice it: I wonder why I’m experiencing Imposter Syndrome now? I am typically a confident person, so writing about feeling less-than-confident makes me feel vulnerable. This is challenging for me, so I’ll try to appreciate the feeling as a signal that I’m getting outside of my comfort zone.
This brings me to why I’m choosing to get out of my comfort zone; I want to encourage others to persevere through discomfort and limiting thoughts.
What about you?
I hope this article will resonate with the NAWA network and start a conversation about these common feelings. What sets off your Imposter Syndrome? What tips and tricks do you use? Let me know in the comments and let’s start a conversation.
Learn More:
https://www.jordanharbinger.com/how-to-stop-feeling-like-an-imposter/
https://www.ted.com/talks/elizabeth_cox_what_is_imposter_syndrome_and_how_can_you_combat_it
https://www.ted.com/podcasts/reese-witherspoon-on-impostor-syndrome-confidence-transcript
Andrea Everling is Vice President of Actuarial Services at MWCIA. Ms. Everling has a Bachelor’s degree in Actuarial Science/Finance from Drake University. Ms. Everling is a Fellow of the Casualty Actuarial Society and a member of the American Academy of Actuaries. Before joining MWCIA, Ms. Everling worked on the carrier side performing ratemaking and reserving for commercial insurance product. Ms. Everling is passionate about providing data-driven insights into the Workers’ Compensation environment in Minnesota. When Andrea isn’t focusing on the workers’ compensation industry, you may find her teaching fitness classes, talking about podcasts, or trying out a new sustainability hack.